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March 2, 1999

Slowly Breaking the Silence on AIDS (cont.)

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The silence among religious leaders is usually broken by the recognition of how close to home H.I.V. or AIDS can hit, she said, outlining a typical scenario: "A pastor who has never said anything about H.I.V. decides to do a special prayer, even though he thinks, 'I know no one in my church has AIDS.' After church, somebody thanks him for the prayer, saying, 'I have AIDS' or 'I am taking care of my grandkids because my daughter has AIDS.' The pastor is shocked and calls an AIDS service organization that helps him begin educational work."

Sometimes the route to an active role for religious leaders is even more direct. The Rev. Franklyn Richardson, senior pastor of the Grace Baptist Church in Mount Vernon, N.Y., began publicly discussing the illness of his brother before he died of AIDS in 1993. "I got his permission to talk about it with the congregation," said Richardson, who is running for president of the National Baptist Convention. "It was a blessing, and a surprise. So many families came to tell me, 'You helped me so much.' "

Now, Richardson said, he discusses AIDS frequently in his church. "We want people to understand that AIDS is not a sin, but a disease," he said. "And like any disease, we want to talk about how to prevent it. That is where sex education begins."

While some leaders of more liberal denominations seem comfortable with such candor, those discussions are rare in churches and mosques that prohibit the use of condoms or that take strong stands against homosexuality and sex outside marriage.

Addressing the quandary in which he finds himself, the Rev. Theodore K. Parker, pastor of All Saints Roman Catholic Church on Madison Avenue at 129th Street, said: "We must reason our way through the church's conflicting statements on matters of health. As a Catholic priest, naturally I advocate personal restraint from sexual activity."

Asked if condoms offered the best protection against the virus outside of abstinence, he said, "Yes, that is true, but we can't say anything else about it. We try to stay within church law while saying, 'You are an adult. You put two and two together.' People know that the priest is in a bind."

Muslim leaders face a similar dilemma. "In Islam, promiscuity, relations outside marriage and intoxicants are forbidden," said Talib Abdur-Rashid, imam of the Mosque of the Islamic Brotherhood in Harlem. "Though certainly there are Muslims who are sexually promiscuous and Muslims who use narcotics."

The approach in his mosque? "We try to keep an open public discourse," he said.

The use of condoms as a preventive measure also presents a problem in Islam.

As a birth control measure, condoms are permitted only if pregnancy would threaten a woman's health, said Abdur-Rashid.

"We say that having a condom does not make fornication or adultery right," he said. "To distribute condoms and not teach the morality of their use is immoral."

With strict views on sexuality, clergy members of the Pentecostal, evangelical and fundamentalist branches of Christianity have also hesitated to join the discussion of AIDS. But in some of their churches, attitudes are changing.

"I have only given one sermon about AIDS so far and plan to give another one in March," said the Rev. Charles Edward Cook, pastor of the House of David Pentecostal Apostolic Church in the East New York section of Brooklyn.

The pastor, who believes that homosexuals and drug addicts can change through prayer, said: "We don't scorn people because of their activity. We offer them a way out through love and Scripture."

As for condoms, he added, "We don't push them. When you push condoms, you are giving people an out to go for sex, which we don't promote. But my wife and I tell our teen-age grandchildren, if you're going to do this, please use condoms. But the best way is to abstain."

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